


Escaping Logs and Green

by Ali_Aphrodite



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Angst, Blood and Violence, Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Domestic Violence, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gaslighting, Gen, Ghost Wilbur Soot, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Torture, Mind Manipulation, Physical Abuse, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade are Twins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 18:34:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28658040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ali_Aphrodite/pseuds/Ali_Aphrodite
Summary: Tommy escapes Logestshire. He needs to get out. He needs to leave. He ends up finding an unexpected place and unexpected help, all the while hating everything and anything. Including himself. Dream of course, isn't happy and is tracking down the child since the moment he knew he was missing. Chaos and Drama ensue, which will probably end up in a new ghost appearing. But hey, you never know, the ghost might not be the person you expect. It might not even appear anyway!
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Technoblade & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Comments: 38
Kudos: 345
Collections: Completed stories I've read





	1. Into the Snow We Go

**Author's Note:**

> Alright- this fic is definitely going to be extremely dark. There is definitely going to be a lot of triggers   
> in here. The reason why I wrote it so dark though is because the fiction that I've read isn't as dark as I   
> would like, but then again I'm a very angsty person so that would make sense. 
> 
> Trigger warnings// gaslighting, slight abuse, manipulation, depictions of violence, panic attacks,   
> breakdowns, things like that- (also swearing and stuff) 
> 
> Don't say i didn't warn you! 

Ranboo didn't know what to expect when he went to visit Tommy in his exile. Surely he didn't expect anything good of course but wasn't expecting anything too bad either. The Enderman hybrid could only visit the sixteen-year-old once every two weeks. If he would visit more than that, Dream would most likely prohibit him from visiting at all. Of course, he would. The former vice president is in exile after all.

Walking through that Nether portal and stepping into Logstedshire, Ranboo was immediately filled with concern. Looking around the area, it seemed like the place had gone through hell and back. On the beach there were tons of Seagulls picking at what seemed like cake on the table; the place that Wilbur had built when Tommy came to exile for the first time was blown to smithereens, the tent was ripped to shreds and also blown up, and there were a bunch of random images of people from L'manburg hung up on wooden signs which were ripped brutally. 

He also noticed the huge pillar in the distance, built on top of a large hill behind Logstedshire. Ranboo didn't want to think of the worst, so he decided to just ignore it.

Deciding that maybe it was a bad time to come after he called around for a bit with no reply, Ranboo walked back through the Nether towards L'manburg, trying to stay positive as tears started to drip down his face.

Tubbo didn't ask anything when Ranboo came back from Logstedshire in silence. His presence didn't give off a good vibe compared to his usual lively self which is full of positivity. 'Something must have happened,' he thought to himself. 'But what?'

===

Tommy had to get away. If he didn't he would be slaughtered eventually. If he didn't get away now, he wasn't sure he would be able to survive until the end of his exile. 

The sixteen-year-old had been walking through the cold plains of the frozen biome for what seemed like hours. It was freezing oh, and he meant that literally. Also, to make matters worse, his clothes were worn out and he didn't have any shoes. The only bit of warmth that he kept was Wilbur's old hat. The one that he wore when he was alive. His physical and mental state didn't help him at all either. His body was weak from poor eating habits along with bruising and cuts. He didn't want to think about how he got them, so he pushed the thought out of his mind. His mental state was slowly deteriorating oh, Tommy becoming desensitized to nearly everything around him.

Not paying attention to any of his surroundings, the teenager tripped on a rock with his bare feet. The rock was unfortunately sharp and cut deep through the bottom of his foot not allowing him to walk. The cold was numbing it for a bit, so he wouldn't feel the actual pain for a while. His expression not changing, Tommy attempted to get up. The cold only pushed him down, adding the numbness of his limbs. He shivered as a harsh gust of wind pushed past him. It’s not like it would matter to anyone if he decided to lay in the snow for a while. Gaining comfort in the softness of the cold, Tommy closed his eyes, promising that he would only sleep for a little bit. 

===

His bloodlust was strong, but how strong he didn't know. Technoblade first melted when he opened the door to throw out some rotten flesh. It made him stop in his tracks as the voices started to scream for blood. His eyes narrowed as he looked in the direction he assumed it was coming from. Being logical, the pig thought that it was just an animal that had hurt themselves badly while falling off a cliff or running into a tree, but this was different. Techno had already known what the smell of animal blood was like, he means, it's pretty common for animals to get hurt around here. This was different though. Technoblade smelled human blood, or at least something similar to human blood. The scent was so strong and made the voices scream louder, his eyes dilating with the inability to control himself.

He hadn’t smelt human blood for so long, it was so enticing the thought making chills run down the hybrid’s spine. 

He forgot everything that he was doing previously, his mind turning to cotton as he walked away, forgetting to close the doors of his house before he left. The pig trudged sluggishly but carefully towards the source of the smell. Even in the thick snow, his movement and eyesight were still as great as it had always been. The blizzard didn't seem to slow him down the slightest as he treads lightly. He hadn't remembered the last time he felt so susceptible to everything around him. 

Picking up the pace as the voices begged him to go faster, Techno felt the scent getting stronger, the smell sending another chill down his spine. He knew he was close, he could almost taste it. The words Blood for the Blood God repeated in his head over and over as he went excruciatingly slow. Adrenaline fueled him and what seemed like giddiness built up in his chest at the thought of new prey. He could see in the distance that someone was laying in the snow. 'Weak and helpless,' the voices chanted loudly. 'Kill them!' They screamed at him, the thousands of voices begging for the satisfaction they crave.

The moment before he could oblige to their callings, Technoblade hesitated. His perceptible eyes were sure he recognized who was lying in the snow, but it could still be his mind playing tricks on him.

Before he knew it, the voices had unexpectedly switched tunes, all of them screaming that it was Tommy who lay there and to help him. Concern, worry, and confusion etched into his features as the blood lust calmed down, letting him think clearly for once. The Blade examined the 16-year-old boy as he kneeled next to him. It seems that the traitorous vice president was unconscious, and it seemed like the blood was coming from him. 

Searching his body and around him, he found a blood trail following Tommy for about two feet. A sharp rock caught his eye, leading him to assume that Tommy had cut his foot while walking. Picking the boy up as the thought of it getting infected filled his mind, Technoblade raced back to his house. It didn't also help how freezing cold it was, and how abnormally light the teenager was. 

He couldn’t risk having the other people of the SMP coming after him. He had already been executed earlier in the day. 

When he arrived at his base, The Blade immediately slammed the door shut, startling Edward who was asleep with his dirt block. The pig nodded an apology to the Enderman before he climbed up the ladder rapidly and placed Tommy on his bed before practically jumping back down it to get some bandages and a healing pot. He was also regretting how he didn’t have any stairs that would make the climb much easier.   
Again, repeating the process of racing up the ladder, Technoblade started disinfecting the cut on Tommy's foot. Though he was internally panicking he was careful with his cleaning, making sure that there would be no leftover snow or dirt. 

The main reason he was rushing was that he was afraid the voices would flip their switch again and decide that they wanted Technoblade to kill Tommy. There was still a lot of blood everywhere. Sure, it didn’t seem like they were going to change his mind about them wanting Tech to help the child yet, but they were unpredictable so better safe than sorry. 

After taking a few hours to show up and bandage the unnecessarily deep cut, Techno took off his cape and covered the younger brother with it along with a few blankets. He wasn't sure how long he could assume the former vice president was outside in the cold. For all he knew, Tommy could have hyperthermia and also some other sickness on top of that. 

He became worried once again when he noticed the blue of the kid's fingertips and lips, the shivering that made anger and guilt hit him right in his very core. 

The former anarchist took the time to examine Tommy Innit, remembering how light the kid was when the pig picked him up. Techno was really strong, freakishly so. The hybrid could pick anyone up with ease, but he hadn’t expected it to be that easy. Tommy barely took any effort, like he was a piece of paper. Tommy looked frail. Vulnerable. 

He had never thought of a more unfitting word to describe the former. Tommy looked like he had barely eaten since the last time he saw him, say six or seven months ago. There were bruises on his face along with some cuts and a newly placed bandage on his nose which Techno couldn’t tell was helping or not. His golden hair that was usually fluffy and bright was dirty and matted, clearly not having been washed in weeks. Techno also noticed the bags under his eyes. He debated whether they were worse than his or not, but it was pretty obvious that it was terrible how he could have gotten those bags in such a short amount of time. When was the last time Tommy had slept? Techno caught a glimpse of Tommy's forearm, which was worryingly covered in bandages.

Questions swirled in his head, along with the inner turmoil of how he felt about all of this. Climbing back down the ladder to go make some food, Techno left the child alone to sleep, preparing for when he would wake up.


	2. He Woke Up, Just Not How He Expected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy wakes up and panics. Techno tries to comfort him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same as the first chapter, read the trigger warnings there. :D 
> 
> Still, don't say I didn't warn you. 
> 
> Also, thank you to the nice person telling me about the tags. Appreciate ya brov. I have the first three chapters prewritten so yeah, this came out pretty quick. 
> 
> I'm an OKAY writer, not good at it so sorry if its kinda bad

Techno had been by his side all night. 

He hadn’t left his side even once. 

Why though? The pig was exhausted. He could just go to sleep. He didn’t care anyways, so why was he still awake? Was it the worry about the L’manburgians coming to his house again and threatening his horse and Phil? Was it because he had felt pity for the child? Was it because of the horrible state the child was in, each time he was away from him his anxiety would spike? 

How would he know? 

This all could have been over so much quicker. Techno could have just given the healing potion to Tommy and leave it at that, but he just couldn’t for some reason. Looking at the younger’s face, he felt compelled to take care of him. Maybe it was just his piglin instincts, or the voices whispering at him to make sure Innit was safe and sound. He wasn’t soft Cshat, shut up. 

To distract himself from his bubbling emotions and the soft mockery of the voices in his head, the Blade took the heated towel of the teen’s head and wrung it in cool water before replacing it. Tommy had gotten sick overnight, most likely because of the fact that Techno had forgotten to change him and clean him up. 

He had nearly slapped himself in his own annoyance when he realized what he had done. Immediately getting up in the morning -which was when he was reminded of the task at hand- and going to the former’s room. 

Techno had carefully taken off the torn up clothes that Tommy wore and folded and placed them into the corner, picking the child up and putting him into the warm bath he already had run downstairs under the house. Somehow he had managed to put in a bath so he could shower sometimes. It was rarely used by him alone but there was always lukewarm water bubbling. To save up space he had put the bath into the wall; he could slide it in and out of the wall without any trouble.   
The pig went behind the kid and laid the youngers head on his chest. He grabbed a cloth and dunked it gently into the water. Immediately, he got to work, sitting in slightly uncomfortable silence as he wiped down Tommy. Concern was finally made imminent in Cshat and himself at how bony Innit was. That wasn’t normal. 

Steeling himself and continuing, Techno made sure that Tommy was completely clean, taking it upon himself to at least try to clean Tommy’s hair too. He ignored the Aww’s that came from the voices, even though he was pretty content with himself. 

He took Tommy back upstairs, placing the child on the bed to dry him off thoroughly and make sure that he hadn’t missed anything. Happy with himself, Techno walked out to get some clothes for Tommy so that the child wouldn’t freeze to death or make his condition worse. 

He came back and dressed Innit, still ignoring the aww’s that came from Cshat. Satisfied with his work, Technoblade sat in the chair next to the bed and stared, his mind completely blank. 

Maybe if Techno had gotten sleep at least once during the past week or so he had been awake, and maybe if Techno weren’t distracted by the voices, he would have noticed all the marks on the child. It was amazing he didn’t even see the worst ones. 

===

When Tommy Innit wakes up in a bed and in some random person’s house, he knew that he fucked up. What had he been thinking? He shouldn't have left. He shouldn’t have even thought about leaving Logsted. What was wrong with him? What did he do? 

All he could think about was the punishment he was going to get from Dream. 

He had disobeyed his friend again, after everything that had happened. It was the second time in two fucking days. Oh, Tommy knew that this was going to be worse than any of the punishments so far. Worse than the box, worse than the chains- 

Panic starts to build up inside of Innit’s chest as he sits up and holds himself in his arms for any sort of consolation. He had no idea where he was, which meant that Dream couldn’t possibly know where he was. 'Actually,' a smaller part of him thought. 'I might be in Dream's base right now,' oh fuck. He was going to be so mad at him. He disobeyed and now he was going to suffer the consequences. Tears start to well in his eyes at the thought of punishment and his breath quickens. What would he do? He can't leave again. If he does he'll definitely be killed as soon as Dream finds out he’s awake. 

He starts crying, deciding that he was going to try to do something. Hide, run, submit, anything! He couldn't stay and face the wrath of his only friend, the one who had been so merciful to him and kind.

Tommy didn’t deserve Dream’s kindness, nor his mercy. 

Forgetting that he had an injured foot, Tommy falls off the bed with a loud thud as he tries to stand up and leave. This only makes his state of disarray worse, causing him to start breathing a lot faster to the point of hyperventilation. He shakes his head and tries to stand up again, his vision disoriented as he stumbled back towards the wall, trying to get any sort of barings of what was going on. 

Suddenly, he hears footsteps coming up the ladder. His mind went blank as he pressed himself into the corner of the room, gripping at his chest wondering why he couldn't breathe anymore. He stared at his knees and held his head with the other hand, trying and failing to hold back a choked sob as who he assumed was Dream stood in front of him. 

You were never allowed to cry in front of Dream. If you did, you'd get punished.

===

Techno had heard the sobbing before he heard the thud. He didn't mind too much when he heard a crying a bit, but he did mind when he heard the thud of something hitting the floor and then loud cut off sobbing. 

Anxiety spiking for seemingly the third time today, Technoblade climbed up the ladder slowly, hoping not to disturb Tommy too much. By the time he had gone up the ladder and fully stepped on to the fourth floor of his base, the former vice president was sitting in the corner, hugging himself with his face hidden as he hyperventilated and sobbed. 

Not exactly sure what to do in these types of situations, the emperor kneeled in front of Tommy and put his hand on his shoulders. He pushed the thought about how the sight of Tommy flinching when the pig put his hands on his shoulders to the back of his mind and spoke softly. 

"Tommy," he said in a soft voice, one he wasn’t used to using. "Tommy, I need you to calm down, alright? Everything is okay, you're safe," Techno rubbed the younger one’s shoulder and cooed, just like he would hear Philza do so when Wilbur would have one of these. His actions seemed to help the child calm down a bit. Starting slowly, Technoblade asked the teenager to copy his breathing. 

With a bit of exaggeration, the emperor started breathing slowly, counting to five in his head between each inhale and exhale. Surely enough, Tommy followed suit with a bit of encouragement, helping him to calm down a bit quicker. 

After repeating this for nearly thirty minutes, Blade had managed to help Tommy calm down to the point where all you could hear were small whimpers and choked. The pig hugged the fugitive as gently as his strong arms could, still rubbing Innit’s shoulders and back for reassurance that he was going to be alright. Techno went over what happened to make sure that he hadn’t missed anything.

Tommy woke up, started crying, fell off the bed, himself into the corner of the room, proceeded to have a severe panic attack, and is now crying in his arms gripping onto him like he was a lifeline. 

This was unnatural. No matter how many times Tommy had been beaten down, Techno didn't think that anyone had seen Tommy Innit cry. He feels the only exception to that rule would be Tubbo, but then still he wasn't sure. Innit also barely gave out hugs or admitted that he wanted one - unless there was Philza or Tubbo - for he was too prideful. Tommy also had never had a panic attack before, and that was something he knew for sure. The kid didn't seem like he was the type of person to even know what those were. 

The self-proclaimed anarchist knew that something was wrong. That something had happened between the last time he saw the Gremlin child and now. He knew that Tommy had gotten exiled by Tubbo in L’manburg. He always thought the name with venom, hating that government to its core. 

The pig thought back to when he had examined Tommy's clothes. When he found him, the clothes were tattered and worn for wear; they were covered in mix-matching patches, dirt blotches faded out the color, missing buttons ripped hems, and so on. The only two things that seemed to be still intact was that beanie that Tommy held on his head - which seemed to be suspiciously hiding something- and the neckerchief that he wore. The bandages that were around his forearms and his right shin were also very worrying to Technoblade. He remembered taking off a pair of fingerless gloves from Tommy’s small hands - ones that a certain dead man liked to wear. 

Another thing that he noticed was the number of bruises and cuts all over the former's body. He doesn’t think that he remembered seeing them when he had cleaned Tommy, probably because of the sleep loss. Sighing, the pig assumed that it was just because of the rough terrain of his exile spot that he had those bruises, which would make sense since Tommy wasn’t used to living out in the wilderness. 

The thought of what exactly happened to the child still loomed over his head as he put the younger back into the bed and under the covers. Tommy was on the verge of falling asleep again, but it didn't seem like he would. Hoping for the best anyways, Technoblade looked at Tommy with a softened face and said quietly, "Do you want to eat something?" 

He was surprised that Tommy nodded, mainly because the child looked dead inside and outside.

===

Techno wasn't sure if he should let Tommy sit at a table or something to eat but Tommy insisted that he would be fine very timidly -again, another thing that Techno thought was a terrible word to describe the child. Shakily, Innit sat up under the covers to receive his plate, which he held close to himself very possessively. Techno sat at the front of the bed, holding his own plate while watching Tommy out of the corner of his eye. The way Tommy tried to eat was very… odd, as he tried his best to put it lightly.

It seems like he had forgotten how to eat. Tommy would stare at his plate, pick at his food with the fork as he held it wrong before dropping the fork on the bed, and making a pitiful attempt to pick it back up. When you finally did manage to pick up the fork, he would stare at his food again before trying to take a bite. Then he would flinch like he realized he was doing something wrong and put his food down. 

As you put the food down he didn't make any contact with his older brother. He hadn't said a word since he had insisted that he would be okay to eat, unusual. "Is something wrong?" The emperor asked, pushing down his own plate to his lap. Tommy seemed to flinch at the question but didn't respond as he hugged himself. "I'm not hungry," he said quietly, barely loud enough for Techno to hear. 

"Why not? You seemed rather eager to eat a few minutes ago," Techno commented with a bit of a louder tone. When Tommy didn't answer, the pig put his plate down and put his hand on Tommy's lap.

"Innit, I need you to answer me alright?" He said with a gentle tone. From the teenager's reaction to that, Technoblade assumed that Tommy assumed the question was going to be bad. 

"Tommy," a flinch. "What were you doing in the snow without anything on you? Nonetheless with a bunch of monsters all around while you were by yourself in the middle of the night?" He got straight to the point, wanting an answer. Tommy wasn't the type of person to go wandering off on his own, even less of the type of person to go without any of his stuff.

"I was running away," Tommy responded quietly again, starting to become nervous as he fidgeted. Techno hadn’t expected him to answer so quickly, without any convincing. 

"What were you running away from?" Techno inquired, cocking his head to the side slightly.

"I was running from… exile," Techno could sense that that wasn't the complete truth, but he didn't push any further. 

"Why did you start running away from exile until now? Did something happen?" Tommy visibly tensed at the question, obviously weighing on whether or not to tell Techno. 

"P-please… don't be mad, okay? He's my friend and he cares about me," Innit sounded shaky as he spoke, almost sounding like he was begging. Like he's done it before. 

"Who's your friend? Why would I be mad?" 

"D-Dream…" Technoblade can sense some conflict in the younger voice. 

"What about him?" 

"I disobeyed what Dream said, he- he got mad at me for hiding something from him, and he destroyed everything," Tommy spoke, trying not to start rambling which only added to the nervousness that Technoblade was feeling. "So I built this… I- I ran away because I was being stupid."

Abruptly, Tommy stood up, or at least attempted to before saying, "but I- I- I need to go now, s-so I should leave." As he said this, Tommy stood directly before the ladder. Techno didn’t try to stop him just yet, letting the child contemplate what he was doing. He didn’t even need to try. 

" I can't go back," He heard the child mumble. 

"What was I thinking? I can't go back now. He knows by now that I'm gone. Oh, Dreams's going to be furious with me. He's going to kill me for good this time," The fear and Tommy's voice continued to unnerve Techno, making him wonder further what happened to Innit. 

"T-Technob-blade?" Tommy asked timidly. "C-Can I please stay here?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoom, okay that was- kinda bad in my opinion goddammit


	3. Talk With A Ghost and An Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno goes and visits Phil and Ghostbur, things don't really go as smoothly as he had hoped. The conversation at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, this is a pretty long chapter not gonna lie. I wasn't expecting it to be this long but hey, what can ya do? Also, this is a bit darker, with a reference to abuse to Tommy and stuff. 
> 
> Sorry, it's a bit sloppy by the way, I had to change it from what I had planned in the storyboard thing. (Also, I just learned that you didn't have to put the chapters as just plain text when your writing it in. Hahah, I'm so smart.)

_ "T-Technob-blade?" Tommy asked timidly. "C-Can I please stay here?"  _

Techno looked at Tommy with bewilderment. 'The oh-so-great Tommy Innit is asking me for refuge?' The pig thought to himself sarcastically. He mentally prepared himself to start bullying the kid like he usually did, a small smirk appearing on his face. He looked over at his  _ brother  _ and paused, then thinking that he should do otherwise. 

Fear is something that should never be on a child's face, especially Tommy. 

===

"P-please Techno!" Tommy said, with a hint of desperation lacing his words. "I'll do anything you want for as long as you want, just please let me stay here! I-If Dream finds me he's going to kill me! Or worse he'll punish me again for disobeying him-" Tommy's mouth shut immediately as the words came out. 

Oh, he unquestionably fucked up this time, worse than he already had. Tommy recalled Dream telling him to never tell anyone what happened between them in exile or else there would be even worse consequences. Not to him, but to the people he cared about. On that day Tommy swore to never speak about it, to protect his friends. Jumbled words and stutters came out of his mouth like a waterfall. Tommy frantically tried to cover up the mistake that he made for the sake of who he was defending. 

Tommy knew Dream hadn't been bluffing. When he finds out things are going to go bad..

"What do you mean 'punish' Tommy?" The pig crossed his legs, settling his ankle on his knee as he rested his elbow, pushing up his cheek. Innit hated how calm Techno looked, did Techno not care? No, if he didn't care he wouldn't have asked. The teen hopelessly racked his brain for an answer, one that would make everything go away and he would be fine and Dream wouldn't hurt them-

"N-nothing Blade! U-um, don't worry about it alright? Just that Dream sometimes does this thing where he 'punishes' me by hiding the log and stuff! It sometimes messes with me when I forget where I put it and things you know?" Tommy stood on one foot and backed up against the wall again, a nervous and unmistakably fake smile on his face. He begged to whatever god was out there that Techno would buy the excuse and not urge him to speak any further. If the pig did the teen would be finished.

"Tommy?" Techno called, speaking in a soft tone. 

Yes?" Tommy replied, not making eye contact with Techno but acknowledging that he was being addressed. 

"You can stay here, all right?" Tommy nodded mutely, visible relief filling him as he relaxed somewhat insignificantly. Technoblade stood up and ascended down the ladder, taking his cape down with him folded in one arm. 

"Where are you going?" Innit asked, peeping down the ladder to see what big brother Blade was up to. 

"I'm going to search for someone all right? Make sure that you stay here and out of sight. That means don't go near the windows, near the doors, or outside. Stay inside and upstairs. If you want to go outside when I come back we can go, if you’re hungry there is some food in the chests." Techno took some items from the bureau on the main floor and seized his Netherite armor and pickaxe. As he headed for the door, he gave Tommy one last meticulous look before walking out and closing the door. 

This was going to be a bit difficult. 

===

A few hours after Techno's leave, Tommy doesn't know what to do with himself. Over his period in exile, he had become very patient, primarily because he needed to be in order to keep himself entertained while Dream was withdrawn. This was strange though. Tommy was given one thing to do, stay upstairs and hidden; Techno hadn't given him anything else. 

Usually, Innit would occupy himself with tasks to complete around his "exile domain". He would do things like build what he would need like a small warehouse, gather materials for holidays or to build even more things, or plan something fun for him and Dream to do once the green man returned to him. Dream would visit nearly him every day, and if he didn't visit every day he would have visited every two days. It wasn't hard for him to find things to do in Exile since it was a vast space of untouched land. There he could do  _ almost  _ whatever he wanted and design as many projects as he desired. He meant, he didn't have to be under the weight of vice president or L'manburg and its people. 

A part of him is glad that he was banished. A distinct part says oppositely. He guessed that made him bipolar.

Tommy got up from his position near the ladder and sat on the bed. He remembered the makeshift bed he had in his tent back over in Logstedshire. Comparing it to Technoblade's bed, Tommy realized how uncomfortable the one he made was. How come he had never noticed? Relishing in how comfortable the mattress is and how soft the sheets were on his skin, Tommy decides to lay down under the covers once again. 'Holy shit,' he thinks to himself, concealing his face into his big brother's pillow. 

He absolutely cherishes this bed.

===

Technoblade wasn't certain whether or not it was a great idea to leave Tommy alone at his home. Of course, Tommy would be able to take care of himself, he was a smart kid. However, that thought still didn't take away the uneasy feeling he felt in his gut at the decision of leaving his younger brother alone  _ -no matter how hard he tried he could never feel strange when he said that.  _

He had a reason to be anxious anyway. After what transpired right before he left, he still wasn’t too confident in Innit's ability to be stationary just while he was gone for possibly two hours or less.

Pushing the worry to the back of his mind, the pig continued his trek through the woods. While he walked, he realized that Cshat wasn't being as loud as they habitually were. It was more alike them having small talk with each other in the back of his mind, not to disturb him. Did the voices care about Tommy too? Now that he thought about it, Techno didn't hear any of the voices while he was attempting to get the little gremlin to calm down. 

As he thought of this, however, the voices started to pick up their typical teasing with him. ‘Of course,’ he thought. Technoblade massaged his temples and picked up the pace, not wanting to be alone with the voices for too long. Occasionally though, he would give pause to some of the stuff the voices have said, like, " _ TraumaInnit"  _ or  _ "DepressedInnit."  _ There are also things like,"  _ Protecc baby," "PROTECT AT ALL COSTS",  _ plus the occasional swearing out Dream for some reason. 

Of course, he wasn’t just going to let this slide as some stupid thing the voices were saying. If Cshat was mad at Dream for something, then he knew he had to investigate. Something that Tommy didn’t want him to know concerning his banishment from the Dream SMP. Tommy is the kind of person that wouldn’t let anyone know anything, not to let on what he knew. Innit was a smart kid, even though most didn’t think so. 

Techno stopped in his tracks. How would he explain something he barely knew about himself to another person? 

He didn’t have much time to think about it anymore, since he had already arrived near Philza’s residence. His messed up but also unironically very sharp eyes studied the area of New L’manburg checking for any people. Considering it was the middle of the night, the streets weren’t excessively packed, only kept with the occasional L’manburgians who lurked around the stands in the main deck. Being paranoid like he regularly was, the pig splashed a potion of invisibility over himself before taking a deep breath. 

This might be difficult, seeing how high Phil’s house was in the sky.    
  
Techno took a running start and leaped towards the roof, gripping onto the ledge with a bit of a loud creak. The strong hog pulled himself up and onto the rooftop of Phil’s dwelling, standing on it and looking around once again. Trying not to get distracted by the decorations, Techno stepped to the other side of the perhaps wooden ceiling, jumping off backward only to grab onto the roof again; Using his momentum to swing himself onto the balcony and into the bedroom. He sees Philza sitting on his bed preening his wings, humming a tune while Ghostbur lightly strummed his guitar. 

“Hey Techno,” Philza noted, looking over to where said pig hybrid was. How did the winged bastard know he was standing there? He had no idea, especially because of the fact he was invisible. Sometimes this man was such a phenomenon to be around.

“Hey Phil,” he replied, the invisibility starting to wear off. “Glad to see you and Ghostbur were actually waiting here. Would have been a pain if one of you was here and the other was not,” the anarchist added, squatting on the floor a bit away from the balcony to avoid being seen by _ seemingly  _ innocent bystanders. 

“Of course we would have been here Technoblade!” the ghost started, puffing his guitar out of existence and rubbing Friend’s ears, who had been napping next to him. “There wasn’t any reason I wouldn’t come since I am a ghost and it’s almost the  _ spooookkyyy houurrr!  _ And for Phil, well, he is stuck here so he wouldn’t have anything better to do anyway!” Philza laughed at the ghost, rolling his eyes at the insensitiveness of Ghostbur. He put his hands down from his wings to let some of the feelings come back to them.

“Why did you wanna talk to us anyway Tech? It isn’t really like you to whisper the both of us just to hang out,” Phil commented, looking at the piglin with his back turned slightly. His wings fluttered as he studied the pig’s expression, concern becoming more and more apparent as the time went on with no answer.

“It’s about Tommy,” he came out suddenly with an exasperated sigh. 

“Tommy? I thought everyone in New L’manburg said he was dead?” Phil murmured, crossing his arms and looking out at the moon. “Did you find something?” he asked, glancing at Techno once again. 

Techno sighed in response, rubbing his hand down his face at the recognition of how he had no idea how he was going to explain this hit him like a truck. “Yes, actually,” the pig started, rubbing his temples. 

“Well what is it?” the retired antarctic emperor stared at Phil while Ghost caressed Friend in silence, most likely thinking over all the information that has been told. He wondered what the hybrids reaction would be to finding out that he had Tommy in his base. He recalled how Mr. Minecraft had reacted to the news about the kid being dead. Techno had been watching after all.

===

Techno sits on the roof of a random person’s house, watching the boardwalk of New L’manburg, the country he had tried so hard to destroy. He inwardly seethed, angry but impressed at the same time of how fast the country had rebuilt and established the government. Oh, how he  _ hated  _ government. 

He downed another invisibility potion before jumping down with grace, strolling casually on the Prime Path with a blank face. Why had he come here? The voices told him to go but why had he listened? He didn’t usually listen to Cshat, so why start now? 

A sob pulled him out of his thoughts, his ears straining to find the source. A few feet up ahead was the boy president, running down the same path he was on while sobbing the entire way. The kid ignored the looks he was getting as he ran back where Techno had come from. The voices screamed at him to follow Tubbo, their noise grating against his ears. 

‘Alright, alright,’ he thought irritably to himself. Of course, the voices wanted Techno to follow the president. 

Although, Techno was curious as to why Tubbo was running down the streets of New L’manburg  _ bawling his eyes out.  _ Weaving through the crowd of citizens, that still had hung around, the pig followed closely to the teenager. He watched as Tubbo raced towards the seating area on the deck, right next to the stalls. Technoblade noticed that Quackity and Ranboo were sitting there, along with Philza who was sitting on his balcony watching the event unfold. 

“Big Q! Ranboo!” Tubbo cried, dropping to his knees in front of the former rubbing his eyes as tears continued to fall down. Surprisingly, they weren’t attracting too big of a crowd with all the bystanders nearby. 

“Tubbo? What happened?” Quackity raced towards Tubbo, immediately embracing the younger and rubbing his head. 

“He’s dead! He’s dead, he’s dead, he’s dead-,” this continued on, much to Techno’s annoyance. He couldn’t help but get a bit worried as the voices started panicking as well, them seemingly sobbing along with the teenager. All he heard was, ‘ _ Noooooo!’  _ and  _ ‘Nooo Tubbo don’t cry!’  _

“Who’s dead Tubbo? What happened? Why are you crying?” Ranboo proceeded to hug the president from the other way around, pressing his cheek to the youngers back. 

“Tommy!” he wailed, causing the pig to stop in his tracks. ‘Tommy?’ he thought to himself, his fists involuntarily clenching as he glanced to Phil, who had a blank look on his face. 

“Tommy’s dead! He, he, he, he jumped- There was a pillar, and everything was destroyed and he wasn’t there and-” the child stopped speaking, sobbing into Quackity’s chest rather loudly. Techno watched as Phil went still, immediately standing up and retreating into his house without a word. 

His face was still blank. 

Techno looked towards Tubbo. It must have been worse on him, considering everything that had happened. The poor kid probably thinks that it was his fault all. The pig turned away from the scene, his fists still clenched as he grit his teeth. The voices quieted down, them wailing as well with each heart-wrenching sob of the young president. 

===

Techno didn’t forget how empty he felt after he heard the news. 

He also didn’t forget how dull everything seemed to be after he heard it as well. 

  
  


Techno took a deep breath, catching both of the Sleepy Bois’ attention. “I found Tommy,” he finally admitted, flinching when Phil dropped the teacup on the floor. The winged hybrid had been making tea in the meantime they talked, something the pig noticed Phil seemed to be doing a lot more recently. 

“Oh, you found Tommy? That’s great! I saw him a few days ago in his exile, he kept telling me about how much he liked lava and the nether. It was a bit weird but he said it was okay because he could always go to the Nether and look at it,” Ghostbur said, making Phil and Techno stared at him. 

“You didn’t think to fucking tell us that you found him Ghostbur!?” Phil yelled, his hands shaking as tears welled in his eyes. Ghostbur only stared at the creator of Minecraft, wondering why he looked so sad and angry. 

“I thought you guys didn’t really like Tommy that much,” he muttered, looking away to pick some dirt out of Friend’s coat. 

The older of the SBI paused, staring at Ghostbur before turning away, shaking as he proceeded to pick up glass from the floor. Techno only stared at the ghost, not knowing what to say as the realization hit him. “What do you mean Ghostbur?” the pig asked, his eyes narrowing. 

“Well um... From what Tommy and the others told me, they said that you guys were always so mean to him. And that you guys didn’t really care for him, and when you did ever try to it seemed like you guys only made fun of him. And also how neither of you guys was there for him, not even you Mr. Minecraft,” Philza flinched again, gripping the glass of the other teacup a bit too hard. 

“Ghostbur we never hated Tommy, nor disliked him. I guess we didn’t show it the right way did we Tech?” the angel looked at him, the hurt clear in his eyes as he forced a smile. 

“Guess not Phil,” Techno muttered, crossing his arms and looking to the side. 

“How about we go and see Tommy!” the ghost perked up, not realizing how much his words held. “I actually haven’t seen Tommy since his beach party. I got lost,” the Ghost added, starting on a ramble while rubbing the horns on his sheep. 

“Yeah, how about we go and see Tommy?” Phil asked, who had sunken to the floor and held his head on his knees. 

“Sounds like a good idea.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo, okay, that was a bit of a doozy. Uhh, let me know if you guys like the longer chapters like these? I wrote this in an hour by the way, so whooooo, not that good. Thanks for reading <3


	4. Speeding Through The Snow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They go home speedy bois while Philza thinks a lot. Also wings.
> 
> SORRY I FORGOT ABOUT THE TW// SUICIDE MENTION

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, another chapter out whoo! I have to revise the story draft mainly because of the fact that the draft has nothing to do with the story at this point except for some very vague things. I think this is gonna be a pretty long story since I'm still at the beginning of the draft somehow after four chapters now. 
> 
> Also! 
> 
> Look at all the kudos I'm getting! Thank you guys so much- 
> 
> Also thank you for your nice comments, I was reading them and it motivated me to speedrun another chapter, hahah!

The walk back to Techno’s snow hidden house was a tad tense. No one uttered a word as they traveled to the piglin hybrid’s dwelling, none out of the three in their group knowing what to say. The ghost’s words still rang as clear as day in his mind, the pain in his heart infuriatingly fresh. The only thing to divert his attention from it was the sound of humming to his left and the melodious beeping of the sheep. 

Philza had been getting progressively more concerned about the health of his family. Sure, to the outside world they looked pretty ordinary -as ordinary as their group could get- but there was more going on under the facade. It seemed that pain and misfortunes always seemed to find their way to his family specifically. Was it his culpability that this kept happening? Was it because he wasn’t an adequate father to keep his boys safe?  _ He would never admit to Techno that he had considered the piglin male one of his children, the retired emperor preferred to be a friend, a brother, and Phil didn’t mind that. Too much at least.  _

Phil’s wings twitched as the cold bit into him, though not as bad as it incipiently would if he hadn’t been bearing his Antarctic gear which he was abruptly extremely grateful for. Taking a deep breath as the house still hadn’t come into sight, the angel strode forward, leaving both Technoblade and Ghostbur to catch up in a hurry. Tension had started to build in his chest at the thought of not knowing what had transpired to Tommy. 

The last time he had overheard anything about the youngest of the SBI, it was news about him being dead, having killed himself in his exile. 

How would he be able to face Tommy? After neglecting him for years on end with his second-oldest, not bothering to check-up on him at any point till it was too late. Philza was convinced that Tommy blamed him for most of the things that had happened; charged him for what had happened to Wilbur. Something akin to dread started to drill itself into him, along with the guilt and regret he had, no matter how hard he tried to make it go away. 

“Have some blue, calm yourself,” then the ghost proceeded to shove a blue crystal into Philza’s hands, beaming while doing so. It seemed the dead man could sense he was distressed, taking it upon himself to distract his  _ father  _ from his thoughts. He watched as the sort of previously blue crystal shifted a shade darker, making him frown as the sadness left him. With it leaving him he felt sort of empty. Odd. 

“Why do you continuously hand out these crystals?” Both turned to look at Techno, who had been addressing the ghost while gesticulating towards the gem. The gem in the hybrid’s hand didn’t seem to change that greatly, other than becoming more purple-ish than blue. Also odd, Phil noted. 

“They’re my blue!” the amnesiac responded cheerfully as if it was the most uncomplicated answer to the question. Only to him of course.

“I know Ghostbur, but why do you hand them out?” Techno pressed, the group had paused the course of their trip to let Friend feed on some small patches of grass that lay around them. 

“Because it keeps people happy,” the ghost answered again, once again waving it off as if it was the most obvious answer in the world. 

“What do you mean by that, Ghostbur?” the ghost turned to look at the piglin, a slightly more hollow look in the eyes of the ghost. Phil never noticed before how the spirit never seemed to have any pupils. 

“Well, the blue takes away your sadness. Everyone seems to be so sad all the time, so the least I can do is cheer them up with my blue!” the ghost replied, stroking Friend’s ears once the sheep nudged him that he was done eating. They all started walking again. 

‘Is that why the crystal turned darker when I held it?’ Philza interrupted his train of thoughts, staring down at the crystals. ‘It was already blue when I got it though,’ the angel glanced back at the ghost, more concern for the well-being of their family becoming ever more imminent. Even in death this cursed always seemed to follow them. 

Was that why the ghost hadn’t passed yet? 

An abrupt squeak was heard to his right, where Techno was standing watching the sky with a panicked expression. He didn’t dare comment on the noise -Phil knew better - as curiosity overtook him. 

“Phil, what time is it?” the piglin was glowering at him, clutching his sword tightly. The more youthful didn’t intimidate him, not one bit. He smirked to himself with amusement as he flicked his wrist to make the communicator appear. Their communicators were hologram type items, summoning when you flick your wrist. It only worked if you had the band on you though, and it was clear that Techno didn’t. 

He looked over the soft glow of the device before clicking on the circle icon in the corner. A large clock appeared in the center of the clear screen. “Four thirty-six in the morning Tech. Why do you-” he was cut off by the sudden bolt of  _ something  _ flying right next to him, causing the angel to stumble a bit. Phil glanced to the spot where Techno had been standing, and to the thing that was becoming a speck in the distance. 

Ah, okay. 

Phil prepared himself before bolting down the same path as Technoblade, using his wings as propellers to catch up to the  _ unnecessarily fast _ fighter. He could hear an echoey cry behind him, most likely in protest of all the snow that had been kicked up by the hard whipping of wings. Mr. Minecraft didn’t care too much of course, he knows the spirit was only putting up dramatics for the enjoyment of it. 

Wilbur had been the quickest out of all of them. The only reason he didn’t try to show it was because he was a lethargic bastard. “Too much effort,” Phil had quoted. 

Sooner than later, the revenant caught up effortlessly, carrying his sheep with him in his arms. A calm smile was on his face as the two of them went at a similar speed. Phil enjoyed times like these; he remembered doing them vaguely with characters from a long time ago. He just wasn’t sure who. 

Both stayed at least a meter away from the Blade, who looked like he was running normally to the trained eye. If anyone other than people who could keep up with him saw the psychotic murderer running by them, it looked like the hybrid was on his way to assassinate someone. The creator of Minecraft laughed to himself. It was funny how terrifying the former Antarctic Emporer was to others, but how much of a baby the piglin was. 

===

Unfortunately, they had taken the extended route to Techno’s “ _ retirement home” _ , which made their trip longer than it needed to be. Even with how fast they were going, which was awfully stressful on his wings with how much he was using them, it took them until five-thirty in the morning to arrive. Not a very satisfying time. 

They were getting rusty. 

Dusting himself off, he stared at Technoblade’s residence. It was a lot nicer than he had remembered. It actually looked like a house now, which was very impressive on the hybrid’s part. Giving a small smile before glancing at the two brothers, who were both watching him closely. 

“What?” he asked, staring back at them with a bit of discomfort. 

“Uh, Phil? You might need to put your wings away,” Techno remarked, going over to rub Carl on the forehead before patting the horse. The eldest jumped, forgetting about the number one rule on the SMP. No sort of flight  _ whatsoever _ , not even wings, or elytra’s as they were referred to during more modern times. 

Carefully, he settled them back into their resting design. It looked more like a cape than anything when they were dormant. He looked at them with a yearning, wishing to be free in the skies and not bound to the ground like a  _ peasant.  _ Phil chuckled to himself again, studying the front door of Techno’s house. 

He only apprehended the weight of the situation until now. 

He was going to see Tommy for the first time in nearly a year, after only seeing him once to  _ slaughter  _ his older brother. ‘Slay the beast,’ he recalled Ghostbur saying to him with a full-on smile on his face. It wasn’t as pleasant as a memory as the ghost declared it to be. 

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, the angel marched from his position on the snow up to the steps. There was nothing to be worried about. Surely the teenager couldn’t stay mad at him forever, right? Right? Yeah. He was going to be fine. 

Why was he freaking out so much over this? 

He could do this. He was pretty much the creator after all. Who was he to be scared of a random child that would only last for a moment in his eyes. Slowly, he opened the door all the way, everything seeming to go still at the sight of what was on the floor. 

Again, why had he been freaking out so much? 

“Tommy!” he heard Technoblade screech from behind him before the pig pushed through the door, staring at the adolescent who was sitting in the middle of the floor.

Amidst ten or so golden apple remains - how? Phil didn’t know, golden apples didn’t usually leave anything behind when eating - surrounding him, another half-finished one in his mouth as he crouched in front of the chests near Edward. 

The kid that Philza had been nearly breaking down about was gawking like he was caught in the middle of crime at Technoblade, his face had gone pale as his eyes went wide. The teen didn’t seem to notice the other two in the room; he had pretty much tunnel-visioned on his friend.    


“Tommy, have you been eating all of my gapples?” Techno demanded, moving to seize the rest of the uneaten ones out of the gremlin’s hands. The angel didn’t notice the flinch that followed when he snatched them out of Tommy’s hand.    


“I didn’t have any absorption! And besides, I was hungry!” Tommy laughed nervously as he proceeds to pick up the mess that he left on the ground and threw them into the trash.

“We have steak Tommy, eat the steak!” the pig retorted, handing the child an entire stack of steak. “Stop wasting my gapples! It’s not useful!” when the younger didn’t take the food stubbornly, Techno nearly slapped him with it, practically forcing it into Tommy’s inventory.    


“Alright, alright, alright, Blade!” Innit exclaimed, eating another gapple just to spite the pig as he held the steak in another hand. 

All of the angel’s previous worry left him, sighing as the weight on his shoulders left him immediately. Phil was relieved that the youngest of the SBI wasn’t doing too bad. He had practically beaten himself down with a brick when he heard about Tommy’s death. Like almost everyone else, he had blamed himself for it. 

Philza laughed quietly at the scene, walking inside with Ghostbur before shutting the door behind him. The slight warmth of the house was unnerving, making him wonder how long Tommy had been here in the cold before Techno had decided to tell them. He forced down his instincts to immediately wrap the child in a bunch of blankets as he forced himself a smile. 

“Hello, Tommy!” the ghost next to him chirped, gliding over to the younger and putting his arms around him. It didn’t make much of a difference either way, mainly because the ghost was transparent in all shapes and forms. 

“Hey, Wilbur?” The former was confused as to why his older brother was here, greeting him with a blank look on his face. His eyes looked around the room before making eye contact with Philza Minecraft. 

“Phil?” Tommy only stared, his face still blank and eyes empty. He asked himself if they had always been that way. 

“What are you guys doing here?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whooo, there you go. Sorry that it didn't really move the plot that much. Dunno If I'm doing good with the pacing of the story and stuff. I'm making these like 2000 - 2500 words each so you are all fulfilled whooooooo!


	5. Fighting and then Children

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy and Phil fight. Techno realizes something about Tommy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo, I might have gone a little over the word limit! Sorry bout that. Also sorry for the late update, I was gonna update yesterday but I didn't have the time to finish the chapter and edit it hahah 
> 
> also, follow my tumblr! @ali-aphrodite 
> 
> i post a lot about the dream smp and will most likely start posting a lot about this too

“What are you guys doing here?” 

Techno remarked at how Tommy didn’t appear to be too thrilled when he noticed Ghostbur and Philza situated near the front entrance. He also noticed how devoid of any actual emotion the child’s voice was. Sure, it sounded rather convincing at first but it still seemed forced. There was a smile on his face but not one in his eyes. 

Red eyes looked over to Phil, who was wringing his hands together nervously while looking to the side. There was an awkward smile bracing his lips, although Techno could see that the older was nervous. Of course, he would be- this is the first time he’s seen Tommy since the Pogtopia Revolution. 

“Hey there Toms,” Mr. Minecraft laughed, uncomfortable with the dead gaze on him. The teenager looked towards Ghostbur and then Techno, a blank look on his face. It seemed Tommy knew he wasn’t going to get an answer out of either of them so he asked the only person he was supposedly comfortable with. 

“Why are they here Technoblade?” the aforementioned hybrid could see why Philza Minecraft would be so unnerved by the younger’s eyes. It wasn’t fitting for the Tommy had known. Techno hadn’t interacted with the kid that much after the child had woken up, so he couldn’t say he wasn’t surprised at the look in Innit’s eyes. 

Techno frowned at how rude the adolescent was being, lightly glaring at him to attempt to convey Tommy’s need to ease up a. 

“Well Tommy,” he started warily, not certain of what to make of this situation. Fortunately, he was interrupted by Ghostbur, who was much better at these kinds of situations than him. 

“We wanted to see you, Tommy! I haven’t seen you since you told me to give out invitations for the beach party,” the ghost exclaimed, going around to look at his younger brother through the front. The younger’s hands jerked slightly at the mention of the beach party, a flash of emotion he couldn’t identify appearing in his eyes. “I’m sorry for not going by the way,” Ghostbur spoke softly, putting his arms down. 

“I got lost. Dream said that he would take care of the invitations when he found me in L’manburg which is great!” he added happily, spreading his arms out with a grin on his face. “How did your party go by the way?” Tommy looked down towards the ground, his fists balling while he stared. 

“No one came to the party Ghostbur,” the teenager muttered, the tension in his fists releasing as he sighed. 

“Why?” the former questioned, a sad look in his eyes.

“I don’t know,” Tommy finished, turning his attention back to the piglin. 

“You didn’t answer my question Techno,” the male being addressed resisted the urge to flinch at the tone. It was so unnatural for the little gremlin to be so devoid of emotion. He had been helping Philza sit down at the table in the middle of the room, ignoring Edward’s growls of disapproval to there being so many people in the house. 

“Ghostbur pretty much already explained. They wanted to see you, Tommy,” Techno tried to keep his voice as monotone as possible, trying his best not to show his inner turmoil. 

“They?” the boy asked, glancing over to Philza who was picking at his hat which now had a heart pin in it along with a crown. Most likely to signify what he was apart of and his accomplishments. 

“Yup. They both wanted to visit you,” the hybrid replied, going to take the elder’s cloak. He didn’t acknowledge the flinch that came from Phil. 

“Why though? Didn’t think either of you cared. Well, maybe Ghostbur but not you Philza,” Techno could sense the hostility in Tommy’s voice, although it was well hidden. 

The one being addressed made no reply, only stared at the table while a bead of sweat traveled down his face. He didn’t know what to say. 

“I wanted to see you,” Phil started, his hands twitching nervously as he gripped onto the hat that was in his hands. “I haven’t seen you since the festival Toms, and I-” 

“Don’t call me that.” Tommy stared at the creator. There was venom lacing every word, causing Phil to flinch. Was Phil scared of the little gremlin? 

“Okay, Tommy. I wanted to see you since I haven’t seen you since the festival, and even then I barely saw you there,” the older blond pushed back his hair, huffing as he looked towards his son. 

“Since when do you care?” 

Even though he wasn’t one to be shocked by things like that, it made Techno pause. The piglin was a man of logic, and he knew that Tommy still hadn’t forgiven Philza for what he had done. That was clear. There was something else though, he just couldn’t put his finger on what. 

Questions continued to surface, with few answers coming up in response. Things were a lot more complicated than he had thought. 

“I’ve always cared Tommy!”

“No, you haven’t! The only time you truly cared is when Techno is involved! If it weren’t for him, you wouldn’t give a shit about me or Wilbur so stop acting like you care just to make yourself feel better, you selfish asshole!” 

Once again the house went silent, not even Edward making noises to ease the tension. Ghostbur seemed to be able to read the room for once, the dead man having gone quiet as he pet Friend. The quiet was interrupted as Philza stood, grabbing his coat back from Techno, who had been holding it during the entire confrontation. 

Without another word, the angel left the house, slamming the front door on his way out. Techno flinched at the noise, rubbing his sensitive ears as he followed his friend outside. He didn’t walk out however without sparing another glance at Tommy, who had that blank look on his face once again. 

At least he knew the kid had at least a little of that fire still inside of him. 

===

Ghostbur watched as Techno and Phil went outside, still awfully confused about what was happening. Tommy had yelled at Philza and he left. Why had that happened? Everything was fine when the two of them talked before? At least from what the amnesiac could recall. 

Why was everything so tense now? 

The ghost didn’t like the tension in the room. It made him feel unsafe and it made Friend antsy. He quietly soothed the sheep, telling them to not worry about it and that everything would be okay. The ghost watched with a bit of worry at the scene, hoping that fighting wouldn’t start. 

The house was beautiful after all. It would be a shame if it got destroyed. 

“No, you haven’t! The only time you truly cared is when Techno is involved! If it weren’t for him, you wouldn’t give a shit about me or Wilbur so stop acting like you care just to make yourself feel better, you selfish asshole!” 

The ghost flinched at Tommy’s tone, becoming increasingly anxious at the silence that followed. Ghostbur wasn’t used to Tommy being like this. Yes, he had seemed a little off during his vacation, having gained a weird obsession with lava in Logstedshire, but the younger still seemed like he was fine. 

So why did Tommy look so empty now? Soot knew that others couldn’t see what he saw. The ghost could see the little orb in everyone’s chest, the only one that showed the status of their souls. It wasn’t as clear as he had hoped but he could still see it. 

Usually, it would be a bright yellow with another color mixed into it. It was usually placed in the center of their chest. Some people had three, others had two, rare people had one of them. 

Tommy had one of them, and the one that he had was grey. Why? Why was Tommy so grey? 

It was unnatural. The only other person that had unnatural orbs was Dream, and the reason that it was so unnatural was that he couldn’t see them. Of course, it would make sense, the man was pretty much the god of this Server, he would never reveal such things to anyone. Such a secluded man he is. 

Ghostbur was brought back to attention when the noise of a door slamming grated against his ears. He flinched again at the sound and turned towards the spot where two people were missing, then back to Tommy. 

Once again, the kid had a blank expression on his face. The look stressed him out quite a lot. He couldn’t remember when he had ever seen the kid without a smile or an angry look on his face. No matter what there was always some form of emotion on his face. Now? There was nothing. 

He didn’t have the capacity to get angry or sad at the sight so he only frowned, questioning why the youngest was so unhappy. 

“Tommy are you alright?” the empty child looked towards the ghost, grey eyes staring into pupilless orange-tinted ones. 

“I’m fine Ghostbur. Sorry about the shouting,” he fiddled with the strings on his shirt, looking down to the ground as he went to sit on the couch. Edward let out a noise as the younger sat next to the creature, grabbing both of their attention. The ghost squinted, going back to pet friend silently. 

“Sorry Edward, I didn’t mean to startle you,” he heard, barely enough that he could understand what was being said. He looked back up at Tommy, who was admiring the grass block in Edward’s arms with a small frown. There was a small flower on the top of it. 

Things just seemed to get even more strange as time went on. Why? 

“Tommy what did you mean when you were talking to Phil? About the thing with him choosing Technoblade over us?” he flinched at being addressed at setting his gaze on to the ghost. There was complete silence for what felt like an hour until the kid spoke again. 

“Just something that happened a long time ago Ghostbur, I don’t want to talk about it right now.” 

“Do you hate Phil and Techno, Tommy?” he asked quietly, not looking up at the younger. 

He didn’t get a response. 

===

Techno couldn’t say that he was mad at Tommy for what happened, nor could he say he was mad at Phil. He hadn’t thought about what would happen if the elder had seen the younger. There always seemed to be a block of tension between the two, now that he thought about it. 

He never understood why that was. 

Once his eyes adjusted to the blinding light that had started to appear over the horizon, he could see Phil readying himself to leave, the angel storming towards the woods. Philza angry was a scary sight, everything seemingly running away from his presence. 

Another thing Techno didn’t understand. 

The eldest of the SBI spread out his wings, looking towards the sky with his trident in hand. He stood in front of the lake, dipping the tip of the weapon into the ice-cold water. He was aiming towards the Nether Portal to the right of the house, which would take him back to the SMP with ease.

“Phil!” the pig hybrid called, practically sprinting towards the angel to catch him before he left. 

“What?” Phil snapped, looking towards Techno with something he identified as rage in his eyes. Although the rage wasn’t directed towards him, he was still just a little intimidated. Just a little bit, Cshat, shut up. He just hoped that rage wasn’t directed towards Tommy or Ghostbur, that wouldn’t be too pleasing to see. 

“Where are you going?” he asked, stepping back a bit to give the Hardcorian some space to step back into the snow. 

“I’m going back to New L’manburg. I don’t need to be here Tech,” he replied, a bit stiff in his words. 

“Why? Just because you had a little argument with the little gremlin?” Technoblade questioned, crossing his arms under his cloak. This was weird, Phil wasn’t the type to just up and go after a little yelling. 

“Exactly,” he could say he was a bit taken aback at the bluntness. 

“That’s stupid Phil. You’re just going to leave after you came all this way? And for getting yelled at?” 

“Yup.” 

“I’m not an idiot, there’s another reason Phil. You’re just upping and leaving after some petty squabble with the child. You didn’t even try to talk to him, you just gave up. That right there is stupid. There’s no reason for you just to leave-” 

“He hates me Tech, can’t you see that?” Phil shouted, whipping around and gripping his trident tightly. “Tommy blames me for everything that happened! For Wilbur dying, for them both having to leave at a young age because I was neglective, for choosing you over them, for everything! He doesn’t even want me around, he considers Wilbur more of his dad than me!” 

Techno stares at Phil, his words sinking in. Neglective? Choosing him over them? 

“Phil what are you talking about?” the piglin hybrid continued to stare, not believing anything that was coming out of the man's mouth. There was unquestionably no way. No way in hell that, that would even be something plausible. 

“Phil what are you saying?” he couldn’t say he was angry, he wasn’t angry. He was confused. What was going on? He thought he knew his partner, the one that was by his side nearly all of his life. 

“I know Wilbur is your son Phil, but-” the ashamed look on his friend’s face shut him up, the same words repeating over and over in his head. There was no way, no way, no way, no way, no way that that was true.   
“Phil are you saying that-” 

“Yeah.” the silence ensued for what seemed like ages after the confirmation, making his head seem like it was spinning. 

“Tommy’s my son Techno.” 

No. 

He wouldn’t believe it. It wasn’t true. He knew that Wilbur was Philza’s son, but Tommy was too? He thought he knew Philza. He thought he knew everything about the angeled beauty he had the luck to be close with. He was lying. 

The logical part of him of course denied everything. It all made so much sense. Everything clicked the moment the confirmation was made. The reason why he felt the urge to protect Tommy, no matter how much he didn’t want to. The reason why those blue eyes had been so familiar to him, the reason why he always found himself staring at the golden hair on the younger’s hair, the reason why Innit always seemed to look at him with such hostility when they used to be filled with so much admiration for the piglin. 

Tommy was Phil’s son. 

Both were so much alike, it made sense as to why Tommy gave him a similar feeling in his chest that Phil did. It made so much sense. 

The chanting in his head didn’t help the situation as he stared at the white snow, feeling as if he was betrayed but wasn’t at the same time. He was only brought back to attention by the voice of Phil, who was readying himself to leave again. 

“I’m going to go back now Tech. Go back inside with Ghostbur and Tommy, I’ll be back another day,” Phil then turned and spun into the sky, towards the portal leaving the piglin in the cold. Slowly but surely, he walked back into the cabin. 

What was going on? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahah, i didnt put the cliff hanger because i wanted to be nice to you guys >:T i think maybe i should 
> 
> thank you for all your kindness by the way, your comments and kudos make me so happy i wanna cry ;-;


	6. Hot Chocolate and Green Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dream says hi, and Techno says bye. Also some fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update guys haha, I was a little busy with IRL stuff. 
> 
> Oh yeah, and also the FUCKING STREAMS-

Techno trudges back towards the cabin, his head feeling like it was full of cotton as he walked away from where Phil had just been. He could feel the cogs turning in his mind, everything clicking together. It was overwhelming, how much everything was making sense. 

He looked up to see Ghostbur watching him from the top of the steps, staring at him intently. They both met eyes and the ghost gave him a small smile before turning to float down the stairs, the sheep he always had around him following behind on a lead. The hybrid watched them leave, not moving until they were completely out of sight; not even a speck in the distance. 

He sighed, dreading the interaction that was going to come as he walked into the house. Painfully slowly, he walked up the steps to the porch and stood in front of the door. ‘We might as well get this over with, no matter how slow you go this conversation is inevitable,’ he thought to himself, turning the nob and pushing on the door. 

The piglin was happy for the warmth of the house, something that he much preferred over the cold. He didn’t like the Nether very much though, it wasn’t as nice as his cabin was. Shaking himself out of his thoughts and cursing his ADHD, the retired warrior glanced at Phil’s son. 

Tommy wasn’t looking at him, instead, looking keenly at the flower on the block Edward held in his claws. The Enderman made a noise of acknowledgment at the entrance of his roommate and gestured towards the teenager. A strangely sentient mob, but it didn’t bother him too much. Carl was the same way. 

He looked towards the younger, a feeling of dread pooling in his stomach at the sight. Techno was still unnerved by the sight; sunken cheekbones, a dead look in his eyes, a blank look on his face- his face. The one that looked so much like Philza but so different at the same time. 

“Tommy?” he called, keeping his voice level. He had hoped it hadn’t come out as soft as he thought it had. 

The teen looked at Techno, making eye contact for a split second before dropping his gaze to the floor. “I’m sorry for how I acted Technoblade, I’ll be better next time.” then silence. The piglin only stared at the younger, shock imminent in his eyes but not on his face. He was in turmoil and hated it. 

Why had Tommy apologized? He had expected cursing, screaming, yelling, insulting him right to his face, and not caring for the consequences of his actions. What had happened to him? The teenager only stared in silence at the floor, not moving. 

Techno realized he was waiting for a response. 

“Tommy,” he said, this time louder. He nearly flinched when the aforementioned youth flinched himself. He frowned, inwardly scolding himself for being terrible at social situations. 

“Tommy, you don’t need to apologize.” he started, looking over the teen. “I should have asked you beforehand if you wanted to see Phil and Ghostbur, that was rude of me,” he noticed how grey eyes widened before they looked away, hiding his face from the third eldest of the SBI. Techno still watched Tommy closely, unknowingly searching for any indications that the boy still had any spec of what he used to be. 

He realized after a minute that he himself wasn’t getting a reply, so he turned towards the closet. He proceeded to take off his armor and cape, placing them inside. He nearly took off his shirt but remembered, there was someone else in the room. Flushing at his own stupidity, he climbed up the ladder to change, feeling eyes on him until he made it to his room and shut the door. 

Technoblade sighed with exhaustion. This was too much social activity for him to handle, he needed a break from everything. His mind was still flooded with thoughts, the voices only adding onto that. Neither of them helped him think straight. 

As he pulled his shirt over his head he looked over to the bed, where the sheets had been neatly put back in their place and the pillow seemingly having been fluffed. Techno continued to look around his room, noticing how neat everything was compared to how it was when he had left. Had Tommy cleaned all of this up? 

He lightly chuckled to himself as he sat on the bed, holding his shirt in his hands. Since when had Tommy become such a clean freak? From what he could remember the kid was the least clean and organized out of the entire SBI, along with most likely the rest of the Dream SMP. 

A frown made its way onto his face again. That wasn’t natural. Maybe it was just Tommy maturing or something, something he didn’t need to be worried about at all. It was fine. Everything was fine. No reason to panic or anything. He held his head in his hands as he stared at the floor. It was fine.  


===

  
More time passed, almost a week or two after Phil had left along with Ghostbur. Techno and Tommy had gotten a lot more comfortable around each other, something the pig didn’t know if he was okay with or not. Soon enough, the two had adopted a routine, lightly bickering between the two, eating, sleeping- platonically, of course - and doing daily activities together. 

He understood why Wilbur had been so attached to Tommy, along with Tubbo and everyone else during everything that had happened over the course of what felt like such a short time. Tommy was such a charming kid, his personality would make you feel good about yourself even if he was insulting you in the process. Main character vibes if you asked him. 

Techno watched as Tommy played in the snow, building a snowman and rambling on about whatever thing was on his mind. He watched, a smile threatening to form on his face. Why was he feeling this way? It was so unnatural to him. Was this how Wilbur felt when he was with Tommy? His attention was caught by Tommy’s words, which made him curious. 

“And then me and SapNap charged after him! We both got him against the cliff and SapNap stabbed him with a sword! It was so cool -don’t tell him I said that- and then we got the discs back! But then Dream came back with a bow and arrow and-” the teen stopped himself, staring at the snowman with a panicked look in his eyes. 

Techno sat up straight, going over to Tommy and putting his hands on his shoulder. “You alright Tommy?” he asked, looking over the youth to see if something had happened to him. 

“Y-yeah I’m okay I think,” he replied shakily, grabbing onto Techno’s arm. 

“You kinda just stopped talking when you were telling me about the bow and arrow-” he stopped talking when Tommy flinched, looking at him with panicked eyes. He paused for a moment, analyzing the look. 

Techno nodded, understanding now that it wasn’t something the teenager wanted to talk about. “You alright if I let go?” he questioned, standing up a bit straighter. He was taller than Tommy, but he was sure that Tommy was the same height as him. The only reason Techno was taller at the moment was that the shoes he wore had heels on them. 

Tommy nodded, letting go of Techno to give the older room to let go himself. “Continue from a different part,” he suggested, going back to sit on the chair that he had put outside. 

“After you tell your story we can go inside and get some hot chocolate alright?” Tommy immediately brightened, smiling at Techno and nodding vigorously before going to continue the tale. The previous moment having been forgotten. 

This time he did let a smile form on his face, feeling warmth in his chest despite the cold. He would still refuse to acknowledge Cshat’s cooing about him being ‘soft’ and ‘adorable’. 

===

Their well-earned peace was disturbed by a knocking on his front door. 

Techno didn’t know who it could be, he didn’t recognize the knocking patterns. It wasn’t someone of the SBI because they would have called out to him or barged into his home without too much of a second thought. This was someone else. 

He carefully set his mug down and turned towards Tommy, who was paling at the knocking -which started again. The retired warrior stood and stealthily sneaked towards the door, looking through the peephole he had made when he first constructed the house. He froze, not expecting who was on the other side. 

“Dream?” he mumbled, flinching when a crashing sound of glass hitting the floor startled him. He looked back towards Tommy, who was shaking with wide eyes on him. 

“Dream? Dream’s at the door?” the teen said, starting to hyperventilate. His voice was way too quiet to be normal. Innit had been quieter than he remembered, but not to this extent. 

“Dream found me, he found me, he found me, no, no, no, no, no,” his own eyes widening, he put on his mask and walked over Tommy with a quickened pace. “He can’t find me Techno, he can’t, if he finds me he’ll punish me! I can’t, I can’t- I can’t be caught!” Techno kneeled in front of Tommy, embracing the nearly sobbing adolescent while looking for a place for him to hide.   
He had an idea. 

Immediately he grabbed an invisibility potion and jammed it into Tommy’s shaking hands. “Drink it and get in the box,” he muttered, pointing towards the box in the corner of the room. 

“T-Technoblade I’m- I can’t,” Techno rushed again, pushing the younger towards it. 

“Techno? Open the door! I know your inside!” Tommy flinched at the voice, his eyes watering as his eyes flickered from the door to the box. 

“Tommy get inside, please, he’s going to do something bad if he finds you. Please get in the box,” he pleaded, trying to keep his voice level and quiet. 

Techno stood up and went towards the door, putting his hand on the nob and glancing towards Tommy. He didn’t see the kid but heard the downing of an invisibility potion. ‘Good,’ he thought to himself as he opened the door, frowning at how cold it was outside. 

“Hello Techno!” he was greeted with a smiling mask. He looked Dream up and down, wondering how the guy made it through this cold only wearing a hoodie and some sweat pants. 

“Hullo,” he greeted back with a small wave, letting out a small ‘bruh’ as he was pushed to the side. Dream went into his house, immediately sitting on the chair where Tommy had been sitting just moments before. 

“It’s really cold out there ya know, sorry for barging in like this,” the owner laughed, rubbing his mask. Techno couldn’t see the smile but he knew that there was definetly one under there. 

“I wonder why you were so cold,” the Blade deadpanned, putting his hands on his hips as he frowned. 

“No need to be like that Techno!” Dream exclaimed, laughing at his rival’s antics. 

“Mhm,” he frowned, realizing that Dream was stalling a bit. “What are you doing here, Dream?” he questioned, remembering the mess that was currently on the floor. ‘I need to clean that up,’ he thought to himself, moving over to grab a wet and dry towel to wipe up the mess. 

“See you made a mess, huh?”   
Techno looked up at Dream, who was watching him clean the mess on the floor. “Way the point out the obvious,” he knew he was being sarcastic, but it was fine. He didn’t trust Dream to not be sarcastic. 

“Answer the question Dream,” he demanded softly, picking up the glass off the ground and going to throw them in the garbage. 

The man sighed dramatically, crossing his arms and watching Techno. “Straight to the point as always,” he chuckled, putting a hand under his cheeks. 

Techno frowned and stared at Dream, still wanting an answer as to what the green nuisance was doing here. 

“Well, uh, you know Tommy right?” 

“Yeah? The kid that got exiled? That was pretty funny not gonna lie,” smooth. Inwardly praising himself for taking improv classes with Wilbur a couple of years ago. 

“Yeah, it was,” Dream trailed off, looking up before back at Techno. 

“Well, Tommy… Tommy left,” he started slowly. Techno could tell the man was looking for any signs of recognition in his face. He wasn’t going to give it to him. 

“Okay, and?” he replied, sitting across the table from Dream. 

“Well I was wondering if you had seen him,” Techno gave the other a thoughtful look, trying his best not to look at the box. A few moments had passed before the Blade leaned on the table, shooting an amused look at Dream. 

“Nah, haven’t seen him.” 

“You sure?” 

“Positive.” 

A few more moments passed before he could feel a smile again, Dream proceeding to stand. “Well, I’ll be going now, see you soon Technoblade!” and with that, the green man left.   
Techno sighed gratefully, locking the door and waiting a few more moments before rushing to the box, immediately pulling Tommy out. 

He hoped that something like that never happened again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha, fluff. you guys are in for a treat when the last chapter comes out. 
> 
> two more chapters to go! whooo, then another story is coming out boissss
> 
> thanks for reading


	7. Love Is Pain, A Game I Was Forced To Play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno and Tommy have an almost good time. They don't like the green man though. (Bonus scene at the end of the chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hey hey, this is the last chapter of this series so enjoy haha. This one is significantly longer, but it's fine, it's the finale! 
> 
> You guys are in for a treat-

Techno looked down at the child in his arms, one who’s invisibility was fading off and was currently hyperventilating. He felt _guilty_ for leaving Tommy in there. He had a faint memory of the teenager being claustrophobic. 

He was jolted out of his thoughts by a hand gripping onto his shirt. Techno was surprised at the sudden movement, tensing up. Tommy grabbed his shirt and pulled himself up, burying his face in the crook of the elder’s neck, and let out quiet sobs, shaking the entire time. 

The sudden urge to _hold Tommy_ came over him, his arms reaching up to embrace the teenager. Techno held him close, shutting his eyes and putting his chin on blond hair. His heart was pounding, he still wasn’t good at things like this, but he wasn’t uncomfortable. The piglin pushed his fingers through the teen’s hair, muttering soft assurances in hopes of relaxing the _painful_ sobs that came out of Tommy’s mouth. 

They stayed like that for a few more minutes, Techno holding a crying Tommy in his arms while they kneeled on the floor beside that dreaded box. 

After the crying had died down he moved to nudge Innit’s cheek - _which he didn’t mean to do, Cshat shut the hell up_ \- before looking at the teen. “Are you alright Tommy?” he asked gently, not wanting to cause another breakdown. 

He got a nod in response, relief flooding his veins.

“Do you wanna get up?” he asked, rubbing a hand down Tommy’s back to attempt to comfort him. He got another nod in response, along with a sniffle. He refused to start being all _cute_ with the gremlin. He wasn’t going to. _No-_

Techno stood up and smiled, holding his hand out to help the smaller up. 

“Now that you are okay, I have something for you,” Techno felt that warmth in his chest at the brightening of Tommy’s eyes. He noticed they were becoming bluer, compared to when he first found the little raccoon child under his home. 

He walked over to the closet and opened it all the way, leaning down to open a box that lay on the floor of the wooden wardrobe. The box was white with a light blue bow neatly done on the top. Techno pulled it out and turned back towards Tommy.

He felt his heart swell with an unfamiliar pride when he placed it on the table. He kept his face blank to hide the excitement that was bubbling up in his stomach; also to ignore the buzzing of Cshat, as of which he wasn’t annoyed with for once. 

Tommy watched him expectantly, waiting for something? Why was Tommy looking- Oh. 

“You can open it, Tommy, it’s for you,” the piglin nodded, sitting across from Tommy like he had done earlier with Dream. 

He watched as the teenager cautiously brought the box towards him, carefully undoing thr ribbon and taking the lid off the box. Techno let a small smile grace his lips at the excited gasp he got as a reaction, and then the fast rustling as the gift was taken out of his box. 

"Is this really for me Technoblade?" The beforementioned hybrid chuckled, nodding as he took off his mask. His smile didn't fail to grow bigger as the teen practically buzzed with excitement, putting the gift around his neck. 

Techno had given Tommy an outfit similar to his, one he had worn in retirement and during the reign of the Antarctic Empire. It was a light blue coat, with an underlining white turtle neck. There were similarly white sweatpants -something that seemed common on the Dream SMP- and a light blue cape that buckled around the youngers neck with ease.

The hybrid let out another chuckle at the sight of Tommy grabbing the boots and staring at them in awe. The boots adorned the symbol of two discs on the soles and a golden crown-shaped buckle placed on the strap to secure the shoe to your foot. 

“Technoblade this is so cool!” he hadn’t expected the hug but took it gladly, both erupting into laughs and happy giggles. The elder let go of the younger, looking at him with a glint of mischief in his eyes. 

“Why don’t you go and try it on, heh?” Tommy nodded with excitement before running up to their room, immediately going to change. 

He had to admit this time. He was becoming soft for the teen and there was nothing he could do about it besides deal with it. 

===

Things had been going smoothly. Tommy was happy with how everything was going between him and Technoblade. He didn’t feel as scared of the elder as he had when they first started their _routine._ Tommy had been constantly worried that Techno would yell at him _or hit him_ for everything that he did, but he soon came to realize that it was alright to do some things. 

He wouldn’t _ever_ admit to anyone that he liked living with Technoblade. He had been feeling a peace that he hadn’t felt in such a long time, and he was absolutely taking as much as he could before something happened between them to ruin their relationship. _(He knew something was going to ruin them, it was just a matter of when.)_

Today was a bit different though, Techno said he was going to run a personal errand so he was going to leave Ghostbur to watch him. _He had argued that he wasn’t a fuckin child but Techno had reassured him that Tommy was actually the one to watch Ghostbur. Whether or not that had been true didn’t matter, it made him feel better._

Tommy had immediately embraced his ghost brother, showing off the outfit Techno had given him whenever he had gotten the chance to. “It looks great Tommy! And it’s my favorite color! I love it even more now!” Ghostbur had exclaimed, circling a proud Tommy as he posed in his outfit. 

He had decided he wanted to build some things and asked the spirit to help him. They had built a decently sized house next to Techno’s and then a huge tower -which Ghostbur promptly said was terrible and that Technoblade won’t be too pleased about it. Tommy retorted by saying he won’t do anything, he would be too intimidated by the sheer power of the cobblestone tower that he wouldn’t even go near it. 

The teen had been a bit sad when Ghostbur said that he needed to go as it was going to start snowing really hard and that he needed to get home to find Friend. They had both said their goodbyes until something happened. 

“Oh look it’s Dream!” the ghost exclaimed, waving over to the green man that was little ways from them. 

“What Ghostbur?” Tommy asked, panic building up in his chest. 

“It’s Dream- Oh! And he found Friend!” Ghostbur gasped, who had gone to hug the sheep and wave at the owner of the SMP. 

“Shit!” he had whisper shouted, immediately going running into the house and scrounging through the chests. 

“Oh, sure I’ll take you to Techno’s house! This way!” The ghost really wasn’t helping Tommy’s situation as the teen downed the potion and frantically searched for a place to hide. _The box,_ he turned towards the box, staring at it as his two sides conflicting with each other. 

He didn’t want to get into that stupid _fucking_ box. 

But Dream will kill him if he finds him. 

Box or Dream? 

Box or Dream? 

_Box or Dream?_

He made up his mind just in time, bolting towards the box and hiding inside as he frantically typed on his communicator. A message popped up on the screen as he sent it, hoping that the ghost would read it in time to make sure that nothing happened. 

_Whisper to Wilbur Soot: ghostbur, don’t let dream find me he will do bad things to me if you let him find me_

He flinched at the reminder that Ghostbur’s communicator had been previously Wilbur’s. 

“Thank you for finding Friend, Dream!” he heard the ghost’s high pitched voice throughout the walls of the house and the clacking of a sheep’s hooves on the wooden floor while a set of footsteps followed behind. _Dream’s footsteps._ He had recognized those anywhere. 

“No problem, Ghostbur? Wasn’t it?” he hated how casual his friend - _former friend,_ he scolded himself- sounded like he hadn’t done anything. 

“Yup!” 

“Well uh anyways, have you seen Tommy?” the teen flinched at the mention of his name, hoping that the ghost would say no. Practically begging to whatever god that existed that the ghost would _say no._

“No,” his voice sounded strange. Tommy resisted the urge to slap his forehead at how terrible Ghostbur was at lying. 

“Are you sure?” Dream asked, his voice lowering a bit menacingly. 

“Yes,” again, a terrible liar. 

It was almost funny, he almost laughed. He was sure he would have laughed if it wasn’t a life or death situation. 

“Where are you going?” he suddenly heard, along with their voices getting farther. ‘ _They're going down_ ,’ he frantically thought to himself, pushing his head out of the box despite everything inside him screaming to stay inside. 

Cautiously, he followed the duo down the ladder all the way to the basement. His breath hitched as he saw the two of them climb down to his previous room. He had forgotten that it was there. Tommy didn’t remember ever making one, but he guessed it wasn’t important if he didn’t remember. 

He realized he had zoned out their conversation, panicking and straining his ears to hear what they are saying. 

“I know Tommy is here,” he had suddenly wished he didn’t tune back into what was happening. He almost dropped down the ladder but the sound of footsteps coming back up made him run back up where he came. The teen clambered up the wood and shoved himself into the box, just as the two had came back up. 

“Well umm, this is Edward! He vibrates,” Tommy wanted to cry at the sound of Dream laughing. He remembered that laugh, the same one that had taunted him but had cared about him nonetheless. 

“Anyways, I’ll be going now,” he swore he heard the silent threat of _I’ll be back soon_ , but he didn’t make any reply. 

After what seemed like hours he finally decided to get out of the box, seeing Ghostbur petting friend. As soon as the spirit saw him he was bombarded with apologies, his brother saying how terrible he was at lying and that he couldn’t convince Dream that Tommy wasn’t there-

Tommy wasn’t mad, he was just scared about what was going to happen next. 

Later, Technoblade came back. 

He immediately went to hug his not normally touchy brother while he explained everything that happened, about to sob the entire time. Tommy didn’t blame anything on Ghostbur, nor mention that he practically confirmed to Dream that the teen was there. It wasn’t the spirit's fault, he knew that. He made it a point to show that Ghostbur hadn’t done anything, although Techno frowned at the amnesiac. 

He did notice how Techno stayed around him more after that, which he wasn’t sure it was good or not. 

===

A few days later, Dream had come back. 

Of course, knowing the procedure at this point, Tommy had downed the potion and immediately jumped into the box. It wasn’t a moment too soon before the green man burst through the door, holding a Netherite axe and a menacing look on his face. 

“Hey, Techno,” he said casually, striding into the house and shutting the door behind him with a slam. 

“Hullo,” he greeted, choosing not to fuss over the rudeness of the admin. 

Dream immediately sat down at the table, not expected to be handed a mug and Techno to be seated on the other side. “Hot chocolate?” he raised a metaphorical eyebrow, not taking a sip of it as he eyed the piglin cautiously. 

“Didn’t think you’d be the type to like hot chocolate,” the manhunt man proceeded to watch Techno take a large gulp of the hot drink, looking over to Dream with a side-eye. 

Smiling, Dream picked up his mug and took a sip. Techno didn’t comment on the tension that released from his rival's shoulder, “Don’t question a man's beverage preferences.” 

They sat there for a minute, taking in their own respective drinks in silence. 

Suddenly a mug was set on the table. Techno raised an eyebrow. 

“I know Tommy is here Technoblade,” the hybrid tried his best not to look at the box. He always seemed to struggle with that. 

“I know you’re hiding him from me Techno, I want to know where he is.” 

“If I knew where the gremlin was, I would have told you by now wouldn’t I?” 

“Mhm, sure. Isn’t he your little brother or something? Or Philza’s kid?” Techno stiffened, he hoped it wasn’t visible. 

“I’m taking your silence as a yes, that one of those two things is true. Well anyways, Techno I need to know where Tommy is. I’ll use that favor if I have to,” the pigling studied the man, seeing no signs of bluffing on the other end. 

“That doesn’t matter. Even if I did know though, why would I tell you? Why wouldn’t I just blatantly lie to you? Wouldn’t this be the perfect chance to make you use up that favor?” he inwardly smiled at the sudden stiffness in who he assumed was younger. 

He could say he was a bit startled by the slamming of hands on his wooden table. 

“Tommy is mine! He is _my_ property Technoblade, he is _marked as mine_.” Dream was getting a bit riled up as they were caught in a metaphorical staring match, neither masked man blinking. 

“I will find Tommy no matter what, even if I have to destroy this entire SMP to do so!” there was a tense silence in the room. He swore he could hear everything in the room, the shuffling of cows under him, Edward buzzing behind him, _Tommy’s breathing-_

“‘I’d like to see you try,” and with that, Dream turned around and walked out of the house, irritably leaving the door open and all the cold to come in.

Techno stood up and shut the door, looking out the window to make sure that the green bastard wasn’t there anymore. As soon as there was no sign of him, Tommy came out of the box, hugging himself and looking away. 

“I won’t ask you about it, alright? You only tell me if you want to alright?” the teen sighed gratefully, slouching and turning to hug Techno. The piglin was getting more used to this than he would have liked.

“I’m sorry,” he heard was muttered into his chest. 

“It’s alright, don’t worry about it,” he replied, running his hands through fluffy blond hair.

They sat in silence for a bit, both standing in each other's embrace for what seemed like ages. Soon, Tommy pulled away, smiling sheepishly at the older. 

“I have a gift for you,” he chirped, going into the closet like he had done the first time and pulled out a similar box to the one that had Tommy’s clothes. The box was placed gently on the table, the teenager immediately going to rip it open with less caution than before. 

He smiled and put his hands on his hips as the younger pulled out a turtle hat and two discs. “They aren’t the real ones, but they’re still pretty good. The hat is so you can’t ever drown, I know you had a fear of that and-” 

“Technoblade if there was a hug button I would be spamming it right now,” they both laughed, a sense of bliss having passed over the duo. They had fun for the rest of the day, playing in the snow and chatting like nothing had happened earlier. 

At night he hugged Tommy, the teen had already fallen asleep but he was wide awake. He never in his life thought that he would be where he was today, feeling close with someone like he had Phil and feeling happy at the same time. 

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. 

===

I stared at Tommy. How could he? 

_How_ **_dare_ ** _he._

**_“I’m with Tubbo.”_ **

I could feel my heart shatter into a million pieces, the pain hitting me right in the center of my chest. Why? Why Tommy? Why have you done this to me? 

I’m not going to cry. I won’t _fucking_ cry. I’m better than this. I knew I shouldn’t have gotten attached. This wouldn’t hurt so bad _if I hadn’t gotten attached-_

**_“You never change do you Tommy? You sided with Tubbo! The guy who exiled you!”_ ** it hurts, _why does it hurt?_

Everything was blurry, he steeled himself to keep standing. 

**_“You’ve just used me from the start! That’s all I was to you, the Blade, the Blade is all I was! An object!”_ **

Make the pain stop. _Please._

**_“You never cared about me Tommy!”_ **

Why hasn’t it stopped?

**_“I am a person!”_ **

I hate it, I hate him, I hate _myself_ for being so _weak_ \- 

Everything else was a blur, all I remember is stumbling back into the cabin, Philza rushing to me to keep me from crashing to the floor. 

“I hate him! I hate him! I hate him! I _hate_ him, so much Phil!” I shouted, grabbing every memory of the teenager and throwing it out into the snow. 

“He betrayed me! He left me for that stupid _fucking_ country!” I climbed upstairs and grabbed that bell, jumping back down and practically slamming it into the dirt. 

“I cared for him, Phil! I did! I would have done anything for him, Phil! Anything! But he left me! I opened my heart for one other person and it was destroyed!” I stopped in the middle of the room, staring at the floor. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I cried. 

I don’t have any more energy to be angry anymore. I crumpled to the floor, sobbing and hugging myself as my _heart was still hurting-_

I can hear Phil speaking, but I don’t know what he’s saying. 

I continue to cry, asking the universe if he deserved this. 

Why Tommy? Why have you done this to me? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Technoangst go brrrrr 
> 
> thanks for reading! <3 
> 
> A new story coming out in one or two days, so stay tuned for that! 
> 
> Anyways, thank you for all of your kudos and kind comments, I love all of them and appreciate all of you- Thank you!

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, that wasn't too bad I don't think. Maybe. Not sure, I'm kinda desensitized to everything.


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